Dr John-Eduard Bosman Psychology Practitioner
082 856 6284 - 35 Zandvliet Crescent, Glen Erasmia Boulevard, Veld Street, Glen Marais, Kempton Park

Couples Counselling

I have a particular interest in couple therapy. In my practice I see a couple as consisting of any two people who are in a relationship based on love and intimacy and who consider themselves to be a couple. I usually provide sessions for couples on a weekly or other agreed upon basis of 60 minutes per session.

Marriage or couples therapy can help you rediscover the love that brought you together.

You may want to consider counselling if you are in a relationship that:

  • is filled with loneliness and silence
  • is full of arguing, blaming, withdrawing or distancing
  • is in constant conflict that never gets resolved
  • feels discouraging and hopeless
  • lacks affection and tender touch
  • feels like the two of you are strangers in the same house
  • seems like you can’t talk to each other anymore: where you and your partner don’t feel heard or understood
  • has lost the spark that brought you together
  • is lacking in sexual intimacy
  • longs for closeness with one another again…

If you are  feeling lonely, depressed or anxious because of relationship problems, you are  not alone.

If your relationship is stuck in a rut of conflict, sadness, distance and frustration, you know  how heavily this weighs on your entire life. You may see how it darkens your moods, damages your physical health and  even upsets your children, other family members and friends.

Together, in couples or marriage therapy, we  can save your relationship and open the doors to those lost feelings of love  for one another. You can find  your best friend again!     

Through  marriage or couples therapy, you can save your relationship and:  

  • Be “Number One” for each other again
  • Make up quickly after disagreements
  • Communicate so that you both feel valued and cared for
  • Trust each other again
  • Hug, kiss and cuddle frequently
  • Have fun together and comfort each other
  • Look forward to being together
  • Have a better-than-ever sex life
  • Ask for and receive the support you need
  • Value and appreciate your differences and what they bring to your relationship

Your  relationship does not need to be dragging your life down!

In fact couples or marriage therapy can help you have a   positive, loving relationship that will strengthen your confidence, lighten  your mood and fill you with energy and hope.

My approach to couple therapy is informed by Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) which is one of only two empirically supported treatments for couple therapy in the world today (Snyder, Castellani & Whisman, 2005).

What is Emotionally Focused Therapy?

“EFT is usually a short term (8-20 sessions), structured approach to couples therapy formulated in the 1980's and has developed alongside the science on adult attachment and bonding to expand our understanding about what is happening in couple relationships and to guide therapists.  In the last fifteen years, Dr. Johnson and her colleagues have further developed and refined the model and completed numerous studies.  EFT is also used with families and individuals. A substantial body of research outlining the effectiveness of EFT now exists. Research studies find that 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery and approximately 90% show significant improvements.” – The International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy.

Goals of Emotionally Focused Therapy

  • To expand and re-organize key emotional responses – the music of the attachment dance.
  • To create a shift in partners' interactional positions and initiate new cycles of interaction.
  • To foster the creation of a secure bond between partners.

If  you are at a loss as to how to begin to save your relationship now is the  time to meet with a couples or marriage counsellor. If you long to be “Number One” for each other again and to feel  the comfort of the other’s arms, contact me to find out how. As a marriage and couples counsellor, I can help to open the door to find your lost love and  friendship.

“If your partner pleads with you to seek help through couples therapy, you might want to consider it. Perhaps see this as an invitation to uncover and reveal more of who you really are—and to learn how to do so together in a constructive way. It’s difficult to see ourselves and our interactional dynamics clearly without reflections back from a caring guide. I have found the research-based approach of Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples (developed by Dr. Sue Johnson) to be particularly beneficial.”

Is Unconditional Love Possible? – by John Amadeo

When is couple therapy not indicated?

The major contraindication for couple therapy is on-going violence in the relationship.

Reference:
Snyder, D.K., Castellani, A.M. & Whisman, M.A. (2005). Current status and future directions in couple therapy. Annual Review of Psychology, 57, 317-344.